How to Overcome Jealousy
Location not found 07-31-2021 8:08 pm
“Jealousy is the shadow of inspiration”
When we feel jealous of others, we are recognizing and wanting whatever that is making us jealous, but instead of feeling motivated to make that change, we choose to look at others’ possessions and successes with discontent and resentment — we are negatively inspired. Luckily for us, it is pretty easy to alchemize jealousy into inspiration.
In this blog post, I will share with you the five steps I took, and have found very helpful, on my jealousy healing journey.
1. Be honest with yourself when you are jealous
There should be no shame in feeling jealous, period. And you especially shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you are only admitting it to yourself. When you are jealous of someone, just quietly acknowledge it — it’s just human emotion, and it’s no big deal.
Recognizing the issue solves 99% of the problem. When you recognize and acknowledge your negative emotion(s) (in this case jealousy), you are shedding light on the path to self-growth, and you are doing so with admirable courage.
2. Identify what is making you jealous
WHY are you jealous? What exactly is triggering that emotion in you? Is it career/academic accomplishment, looks, body, wealth, lifestyle, or all of the above? The key here is to be completely honest with yourself, and be open and accepting of your own desires, even if they are masked with the feeling of envy. Allow yourself this safe and sacred space of your own mind to explore yourself and your own desires. After all, what’s wrong with wanting betterment in ourselves and our lives?
After you have identified what you desire, list them all out. You can do so by either privately listing them out on paper, or in your mind — now they are no longer what you (subconsciously) believe as what you lack. Instead, they are now your new goals; traits and/or accomplishments that your ideal self possesses; new intentions you set for yourself; and most importantly, new vision you hold for yourself that is going to manifest into reality.
3. Believe in yourself and work for it
With the list of your current desires, it is now time to change the stories you tell yourself. Believe that you can create and obtain anything you set your mind to. Yes, you are that powerful.
Whether it’d be physical features or accomplishments, if some other human being can obtain it, you can too. Say that you envy other’s physical, facial features, but haven’t you noticed that beauty comes in million forms? What makes one beautiful is the confidence and self-love they exude, so work on your confidence, and learn to rewire your brain into loving yourself and your physical features. For those of you who are open to explore the law of attraction, and are open to manifesting physical appearance changes and attractiveness, know that learning to love yourself unconditionally is a crucial step in this manifestation process.
Accomplishments, too, come in many forms. But we can all agree that the biggest success to any individual would be to self actualize, in all aspects of one’s life. The key here is finding out who this “self” is. Everybody is different; we like different subjects, think different thoughts, have different passions, interests, skills, needs, and wants... Thus, while it is normal to desire others’ successes, finding out what fulfills YOU is the most important step in self actualizing. Once you have done that, try to be grateful when you meet someone who you think is a few steps ahead of you, because being able to learn from others’ experiences is a blessing in and of itself.
No matter what it is that you desire and see in others, find a way to obtain your own version of it, hold on to it, work for it, and witness the magic of transformation right in front of your eyes.
4. Understand that you will grow if you decide to learn from others instead of feeling envious
This world is not a zero-sum game. Remember that true inner confidence is what makes one shine bright (like a diamond 💎 ). Do you want to live as someone’s shadow, or shine as your true authentic self? Of course, to live unapologetically as your true self is easier said than done. The most obvious reason is the fact that most people don’t even know who they truly are and what they truly want.
One who truly understands themselves will understand that each and every single one of us is unique in our own ways. It simply does not make sense for us to feel defeated when we see others succeed earlier/faster than we do, as we all walk different journeys in life. We shall all shine our own unique light, as that is what makes this world beautiful.
The fact that we are all different allows us to learn from one another. I personally promise you that no matter who it is that you are dealing with, you can always find something fascinating, inspiring, or eye-opening about that person, as long as you keep an open heart. So why miss out on these learning and growing opportunities for jealousy? Let go of envy because other people deserve to feel proud, fulfilled, and successful too. And so do you.
5. Be gentle to yourself; be your own lover, best friend, mentor, nurturer, and cheerleader
Healing of a negative emotion is never a linear process. You may find yourself celebrating others’ successes on some days, and feeling jealous on another, and that’s okay. Don’t talk down or guilt trip yourself into thinking you are a bad person. Simply take a deep breath, and pull your attention and awareness back to yourself, to your own center. Remind yourself — there is no need to feel lack, if I want it, I can get it. I can work for it and I can create it. I am a powerful being and I have all the magic within me.
Be the person who loves you the most, and treat yourself like how you want and deserve to be treated. Be gentle, be patient, and be that light house for yourself on this healing journey.
Alchemize jealousy into a guide for building your #hashtag desires & goals list, and join me on this magical glow up journey ✨
Your friend,
Christine How
